As I told you last week, Strauss is an interesting guy. He generally goes just by the name “Strauss,” like “Cher” or “Liberace.” He once had business cards stating the same. Even his mother called him “Strauss.” And sure enough, when we met up with him last week in Stone Harbor, NJ, his wife Sue said to us, “Oh, Strauss is in the backyard.”
I met Strauss our first year at Carleton College in Northfield, MN, in 1970. We played together on the freshman basketball team. And while I later went on to have some degree of success as the captain of varsity my senior year, Strauss was the one who really loved the game. Where I last played competitive basketball 26 years ago in 1988, Strauss, now 63 years young, still plays pick-up ball several times a week year-round for the last, oh, let’s say, 59 years.
Like me, Strauss is a baseball freak. He’s the only guy I’ve met who can really challenge me in baseball trivia. A lot of casual fans know that Babe Ruth hit 60 home runs in 1927. The more serious ones may know that the pitcher who served up the epic 60th long ball was Tom Zachary of the Washington Senators. But only extreme diehards such as Strauss and myself would know not only the name of the fan who caught the ball in the stands that fateful day, but also how old the fan was and his address (Answers: Joe Forner, 40 years old, 1927 1st Ave. N., Manhattan). That’s how we wasted our time as undergrads: searching the colleges microfilm archives of the “New York Times.”
Strauss went on to become an incredible writer, although I could certainly teach him a thing or three about blogging. He’s written for “Sports Illustrated,” “The Philadelphia Inquirer,” and the “New York Times” as well as hundreds of other publications. He currently free-lances and is working on a hard-hitting, journalistic masterpiece about some dippy couple RV’ing across the country. We’ll let you know when it gets published … in “The New York Times”!
Amazing!
New Jersey also won’t let you make right-turns-on-red-after-stops at most intersections. That was a hard habit for me to break. Other state rules include the one where you can’t live in a campground.Say what?!
And they charge for just about everything: toll roads, toll bridges, toll alleyways.
OK,OK, … enough with the Jersey rant.
As you well know, Sunday, July 6, is a national holiday. After all, who can forget where they were on July 6, 1991, when Kaye and Stuart finally made it legal, matrimonial-wise at least. So, as soon as we reached the new campground in Clarksboro, we were off to celebrate our 23rd anniversary suitably clad in the same duds we wore on our wedding day – a Hawaiian shirt for me and a white, Hawaiian sundress for Diedre.
Fortunately, it was just 54 miles between campgrounds. And the choice to spend our big day with the Strauss family was easy since July 6 was also Strauss’s birthday. We had a great dinner at Quahogs with the four Strausses (Straussi?). Strauss was especially smug this day since he shares his birth date with Sylvester Stallone, Nancy Reagan, and George W. Bush. Diedre can claim the Boss, Bruce Springsteen, as not only having the same birthday but actually being born on the same exact date. I’m reduced to having the same birthday as 1950’s Red Sox pitcher Ike Delock as well as the ending date of “the war to end all wars,” World War I (which it didn’t). So, I got that going for me.OK, on to Philadelphia. We were up early on the morning of Monday, July 7, since this would just be a six-day week in Philadelphia owing to the need to add an extra day to next week’s New York City trip in order to assure our attendance at two, not one, Major League Baseball games. We found Strauss meditating in his backyard in Haddonfield, NJ. He was just gearing up to face the commitment he had made when he had rashly volunteered to give us a personal tour of his town, his city, his “Philadelphia.”
We jumped into his car, “The Urban Assault Vehicle,” so named because of its lack of fear of being hit by other crazy Phillie drivers. As Strauss drove on in this “Urban Assault Tour,” (Copyright 2006) he gave us a few Philadelphia phirsts: the first drive-in movie theater; the first round-about.
The day’s tour included the following historical sites of classical Philadelphia, all conveniently located within walking distance of each other:
-Independence National Historical Park. There we first viewed the foundation of the Original White House (George Washington’s Presidential house) which was in Philadelphia. Who knew?
-The Liberty Bell. The housing for the bell was located about where Washington’s slave quarters were located. Hmmm … Different times, I guess.
-The Tomb of the Unknown Revolutionary War Soldier. Located at Washington Square, this tomb, which I did not know existed, was watched over by a bronze statue of George Washington. Diedre wanted to know if it was just her, or did it look like Washington was carrying his golf bag?
-Independence Hall. This epic location is free to tour, but it’s so popular you have to reserve tickets to get in. Luckily, Strauss knew the ropes and had arranged for tickets for us. The Hall, built in 1732 as the Pennsylvania State House, was where the Declaration of Independence was signed as was the Constitution and was also where George Washington accepted command of the of the Colonial armies … and there we were, sitting in that exact room where this all happened, where the country was formed. You could almost feel the history seeping into your bones.As we were soaking in the atmosphere where they did the actual signing of the Declaration of Independence, Strauss had a question for me. He wanted to know where John McCain was sitting during the signing.
Also in this building was the site of the original Supreme Court. There were just six chairs, so we’re guessing the chief justice broke all ties ... either that or a coin flip. -The Dolly Madison House. This was a lovely three-story brick building. Strauss noted that there was a stoplight nearby, thus qualifying this abode as being in the “red-light” district.
Don’t quit your day job, Strauss.
-Jim’s Steaks. Famous for the original “Philly Cheesesteak” since 1939, we had to stop there for lunch. It was everything I hoped it would be, although Diedre “The Food Sheriff” put her foot down at having the infamous sandwich covered with cheese-whiz. She’s a good sport, but she has to draw the line somewhere.-The Betsy Ross House. Diedre demanded we stop here so she could get some helpful hints for her crocheting. After all, legend has it Betsy stitched the first American flag in 1777.
-The 9th Street Italian Market. We had to drive down this street where Rocky Balboa did his famous training run on his way to the Philadelphia Museum of Art where he was late for an oil painting class. Diedre, always a fan, found the The Italian Stallion in the museum’s park and demurely showed her appreciation for his art. I did my best “Rocky” imitation while Strauss waited nearby double-parked.
This, indeed, had been a fine day. Seeing the room where our country started was big, maybe at least the 3rd greatest thing I would see that day … only after 2) the “Rocky” statue and 1) a visit to Three Stooge Larry Fine’s birthplace. Diedre `scoffed, announcing that having an original Philly Cheesesteak was her number one. I guess there’s just no accounting for taste.
At the end of the day as Strauss drove the Urban Assault Vehicle back to his spacious home in Haddonfield, he made one last stop to show off his city’s connection with the past … the ancient, pre-historic past. Near his home is a site where a hitherto unknown dinosaur had been discovered. It was a real boon to anthropologists as, through use of this site and its remains, they were able to determine the reproductive methods of these lumbering animals.On Tuesday, July 8, my streak of walking (3 miles)/exercising would reach 900 consecutive days, so we had to pick out a particularly significant site to traverse and mark the occasion. We came up with “The Bank Battlefield Park” hike. Here was a house owned by James and Ann Whitall that was commandeered for use as a fort to fight the British in a decisive battle in 1777. A very put-out Mrs. Whitall refused to watch the great conflagration, instead opting to sit in the basement and knit while watching CNN.
That night we continued the “900” celebration with a trip to the movies to see another of Hollywood’s newest method of story-telling: the prequel. “Malificent,” the real story behind Sleeping Beauty and the Wicked Witch, was actually pretty good. Now, we’re not big fans of Angelina Jolie ever since her part in that whole ”Brad and Jennifer break-up thing,” but we had to admit she did a nice job here.
The next day on the advice of our Philly guru, Mahatma Strauss, we took a day-trip to Princeton, NJ, home of Bill Bradley U and a great Revolutionary War battlefield. Once there, we decided to hike part of the route of General George Washington’s march by night from Trenton to Princeton where the Battle of Princeton, one of the fiercest battles of the American Revolutionary War, took place. This all happened on January 3, 1777, at the Thomas Clark House and farmland. Washington famously rallied his soldiers as he approached the Clark house, saying, “Parade with us, my brave fellows! There’s but a handful of enemy and we will have them directly!” The British general less famously uttered those fateful words: “Where the hell are my britches?”
It goes without saying that we won that fight which was Washing-ton’s first field victory over the British. Nice going, General!
We then took a nice walk through Princeton University’s lovely campus, enjoying their football stadium and various statues of the school’s mascot and my personal animal kingdom fave, “The Tiger.” Our tour was only constricted by the setting sun and our lack of quarters for the parking meter. I’m sure General Washington had no such problems back in ’77. I mean, after all, he’s ON the quarter.On Friday, July 11, we made it to major league baseball stadium number 22 (out of 30), the Philadelphia Phillies' “Citizens Bank Park.” Once again, we braved the beastly traffic in Strauss’s “Urban Assault Vehicle,” fearlessly arriving at the stadium with nary a scratch.
On our usual pre-game-outside-the-stadium-Strauss and I opted to have our picture taken with the statue of longtime (50 years) manager of the Philadelphia Athletics, Cornelius McGillicuddy (better known as “Connie Mack”). And then there’s me with the statue of Hall of Famer and all-around good guy, Mike Schmidt.
Being a sports writer of yore, Strauss used his considerable contacts to get us a backstage (back-dugout?) tour of the facility. Jody Eichel, head of social media for the Phillies, showed us around. We even got to meet Dan Baker, the team’s public address announcer, who gave us the difficult-to-get tour of the “video room.” (Diedre claims it’s the “media” room. Po-tay-toe, toe-mah-toe).
In this area was a marvelous hand-casting of Phillie pitcher Roy “Doc” Hallady’s hand gripping the ball from his perfect game tossed May 29, 2010, versus the Florida Marlins. 
The night ended up just fine with “our” Phillies grabbing a 5-2 win over “our” last week’s team, the Washington Nationals. Two home runs by shortstop Jimmy Rollins drove in three runs, and that was all that Philadelphia needed. The win brought Diedre and my win-loss totals to 6-4, a record that would be lusted after by my three last-place teams, the Cubs, the Twins, and the Diamondbacks.OK, take a deep breath … and exhale slowly … and visualize yourself in your happy place … and then brace yourself:
New York City is next!
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